Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Human Centipede

So we've all seen the ad for Human Centipede. Well I've had some thoughts about how the human centipede would really work out.... if done for real though.

Fatty Fronty - This thing is connected by the gastric system so, the front man will be the only one doing the eating. Each person still has their own stomach, so the only one really getting any nutrients from food is the front man. Also, I doubt this thing can move very well, so a whole lot of sitting and eating can lead to one big fatty.

Dead Middle - Doesn't eating poop kill you? I know German skat eaters can get away with swishing it around in their mouths, but doesn't trying to turn someone else's poop into your own poop open someone wormhole is time and kill you? Something like that. Plus talk about no nutritional value. Fatty McGee already sucked those up for himself. Bottom Line, whoever is in the middle is going to eat shit and die.

Skinny Legs - It's pretty apparent now that the last person is going to get little to no food at all, especially if the person in front of them dies!

Imagine a hippo, sitting on dead Klaus Barbi, sitting on Ally Mcbeal. Just no good.

Aside from these overlooked details, I still want to see this movie. It might become my new favorite cheesy horror movie right after Night of the Creeps.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Summer needs a calendar

Hey summer, way to be a month late. If I didn't have that fan, Coco might have melted into a hairy puddle.

Monday, September 20, 2010

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Friday, September 17, 2010

Photo or Video?

 Leaving the video setting on at Disneyland. Also we got our faces painted

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Food and cameras

Now that I've upgraded my cellular instrument it's easier to take good quality photos on the fly. Last night it was southwest tacos with sliced tri tip and chicken cooked in red salsa, cheese and cottage cheese topped with more cheese and avocado.
Then, today it was a turkey sandwich filled with (in this order) hummus, tomato, spinach, cucumber, turkey, avocado, muenster cheese, and horseradish Dijon mayo on wheat bread.

Can't wait for dinner

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Chinese Pancake

What do the chinese know about pancakes?

Apparently everything.

I was introduced to this sucker in Seattle at Voulas and boy was it tasty. This monster is a giant pancake with an egg dropped inside along with sliced ham. My version came out pretty darn good. The only difference between mine and their is that all I had was blueberry pancake batter and turkey instead of ham. Oh well, it looks like a pile of puke, but tastes like Ms. Butterworth and a Turkey are making love on your taste buds.
Serving size for the package of batter was 8..... I made 1. Sorry for the blurry picture, I was running towards the pancake to eat it.

Monday, September 6, 2010

Breakfast sandwich

Hash browns, eggs, veggie patty, grilled lettuce, havarti cheese on a bun with spicy mayo and ketchup. Hello breakfast.

Also, check out that quality iPhone pic. Ba-zing

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Vac Man

Honestly, I liked playing with this a little bit more than my stretch armstrong for a few reasons.

1) He stayed stretched! How cool is that? and even if you didn't suck all of the air out of him, he could still stretch and release like Mr. Armstrong.
2) No corn syrup. Health nuts try to avoid it in their food, I try to avoid it in my toys.
3) The release button. This is when it got crazy and with a touch of a button he shrunk back to normal size. Now in writing that seems like some toy in the future.... not 1994.
4) He's naked. Whenever I would stretch Stretch, his bike riding shorts (or whatever they were) would find someway of interfering with my stretching fun. Vac Man knows how to party.
and 5) His name is Vac Man.

I loved my Stretch Armstrong and his little dog too, but when his armpit gave way and a sea of corn syrup covered my room, I still had my little vacuumed friend to play with. 

90's toys kicked ass