Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Fuck Yes or No

One of my favorite paragraphs from Mark Manson's "Fuck Yes or No" writeup. Have a read of it yourself, it's quite good.

For the past few years I felt it was good practice to assume new people you meet have written a book. Just to give a stranger the benefit of the doubt on whether or not they could possibly impress you, makes for a much more positive meeting and friendlier interactions. Give it a try, maybe you'll give that person a 'fuck yes' once you actually get to know more about them.

Saturday, November 15, 2014

Stupid Little Squares

They're finally here!

Friends have been asking me about prints of my stupid little squares that I post on Instagram. Well the time has come for a full fledged store!

I love the products Society6 offers so I decided to sell with them again, as I do with my fine art prints. With the volume of squares there are, it was just too many for little ol' me to be making prints myself. Currently, this is the only place that prints of my squares are available.

To purchase original squares, please visit my website or subscribe to my art on ZIIBRA.

Monday, November 3, 2014

Mike Oncley's Tales of Horror Part 4

Electric Eat 1964
by Robert Indiana

In 1964, before the zombie fad
There was an army of zombies Robert Indiana had
They lived on his ranch, and had space to run
Each one of them felt to be Robs daughter or son
He fed them and bathed them and cared for them deeply
He didn’t find these rotting corpses creepy
Night and day he would tend to their needs
Early morning runs and late night feeds
They say when you love someone, to let them be free
So that’s what he did when he got out his key
He unlocked the door and showed them the way
To freedom of choice, but the zombies didn’t obey
They just seemed confused, looking for a meal
No motivation to gather, none to steal
Roberts training had failed, they were used to being fed
So he constructed a sign that would help out the dead
A reminder to EAT, yes EAT everything
"Get it yourself, there is no food I will bring”
So the living dead feasted and bit and chewed
The living ran in terror as the dead did pursue
Keeping in mind to keep that sign in view
or else they may forget what to do
After weeks of feasting on animal entrails
Robert Indiana was shocked at all the killing this entailed
"I fed you grains and legumes and soy!
I never wanted death when my zombies were deployed"
So he quickly ran to the source of their thoughts
A brightly lit EAT, burning at 3 million WATTS
He then bent down to the lower left side
and loosened some bulbs to loosen the zombie's pride
FAT the sign read, “You’re all getting fat!
Put down those brains and eat healthy snacks"
The zombies were outraged, betrayed by their father
“We can’t fight our instincts, don’t be a bother!”
Thus began the great zombie migration
Greatly offended, they headed to the train station
“But where will you go?” asked Robert in confusion
“Maybe the woods, to scare kids who are boozin
or to the snow to leap out at campers
or maybe the desert to party with the vampires”
With a whistle and steam, the locomotive was gone
When Robert got home, the lights were still on
He unplugged the sign, ashamed at his ignorance
forever saddened by the absence within his fence
It wasn't till ’07 that Robert fixed the sign
Tightened the bulbs and brought it inside
Facing his window he hoped it’d be seen
and that his zombie family would return home, to EAT

by Mike Oncley

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3

Sunday, November 2, 2014

Mike Oncley's Tales of Horror Part 3

Vote McGovern 1972
by Andy Warhol

In 1969, our boy Richard Nixon died
“Oh Mike, you must be mistaken.” You’re thinking inside
But nay! Nixon, had a head on collision
In his President’s limo cause by the car driver’s bad vision
But the sun roof was open and old Nixon got snagged
Popped his head clean off and into his bag
His men did scramble to get him some aid
They thought of one name, but they were all too afraid
"Old Dr. Andy Warhol, he’ll know what to do
I heard he re-animated a thing or two”
So they took in the head, and the body came next
and begged mr. warhol to "at least try his best!”
So they showed him their goods, and from what he could tell
“That bodies too old” Andy said, “it’s beginning to smell
Come to the pantry, I'll see what I’ve got”
So he looked through his bodies that hadn’t begun to rot
“Here’s a fresh one! His name’s Brian Jones.
He’ll have the head of old Nixon, and a body from the Rolling Stones"
So he jammed on the head, a staple in back, a staple up front
He began to speak! About politics and that you can’t always get what you want
A little more stapling, the job was complete
They loosened the straps, he stood to his feet!
A look to his left, a look to his right
He walked to the car, and got on with a presidents life
Come time for reelection in 1972
Nixon policies stunk, and Andy knew what to do
He grabbed his brush and an old photo he took
Painted Nixons face green, with it’s menacing look
to tell the world of this monster, that he had created
But Nixon fought on, he toured and debated
So Andy then planned to throw the party of the year
To inform everyone of the monster we’ve got here
"My new club in Soho, it’s called “Watergate”
We’ll all meet up there, try not to be late!"
Soon Nixon got word, it traveled quite quickly
He knew of the party, of his face looking sickly
He sent out his men, to bug up the place
“Do it quickly, and don’t leave a trace!”
So they did what he said, at their speediest pace
Only noticing the name on this space
Not taking note of the address on the building
With Nixon’s new handwriting, the map was confusing
Now, if you think about all of the coming events
that we all know from the history of our governments
The cases, the questions, recordings and lying
All leading up to old Nixon resigning
It’s safe to say Andy won their game
of who could cause the other party the most shame
Quickly ending the rein of old Nixon
It seemed that this monster, was AGAIN, in need of some fixin

by Mike Oncley

Part 1
Part 2
Part 4 

Saturday, November 1, 2014

Mike Oncley's Tales of Horror Part 2

Double Elvis 1963 & 1976
by Andy Warhol

As not many of you may know
There was much more behind that little white fro
Andy Warhol was not only mad
But a mad scientist, who wasn’t half bad
A couple love potions, a guy back from the dead
He even sewed Brian Jones(rolling stones) body to Richard Nixon’s head!
By the time word hit his A-list clients
A young southern boy said he wanted to try it
“Try what?” asked Andy, “You’re being quite vague”
“Any experiment!” responded Elvis, “transplant my leg!”
But Andy knew better, not to waste his great skills
The machine he then described, gave Elvis chills
“From here to there, to any time, I’ll move all your atoms!"
“Time travel exists?” Elvis could not even fathom
"I’ll load you in here, you exit right there
Simple as that no need to be scared.
The question now is what time you’d appear”
“Try 1976, that sound like a good year”
So Mr. Presley hopped in, Andy set his date
No one foresaw Presley’s new fate.
As many may know, teleportation is scary
When one side moves over, results may vary
Say, if a fly flew in to one side
You’d have Flyvis, the sexy bug with southern pride
Fortunately for our protagonist, there was no fly
Simple absence of matter, so the machine gave it a try
It sent Elvis flying, through time and through space
Well, half of him that is, his hips and that handsome face
What was left behind wasn’t the man we know
But a lesser being, who could still play a good show
Less self control and a little bit fatter
Elvis2 was half the man, but twice the matter
So the world would have to settle for these identity tricks
Until Elvis1 would appear in 1976
13-years of solace, in galaxies above
Elvis1 returned, ready for his hat and gloves
Andy welcomed him with worry in his eyes
“The other you's been performing, and eating all the pies”
Elvis1 quickly took off, to meet this imposter
to hopefully redeem the image left by this monster
With talking and planning, it took them a year
to finally decide what they’d have do here
“The name has been soiled, Elvis is dead,
Lets go to a place I’ve spent some time in instead”
We’ll go out in space, we’ll dance in the stars
Where we’re going, we need no guitars
So In 1977 the Elvis’ took action
They approached the machine and decided to pack in
"Both in one? Maybe we’ll merge”
Although years before this caused them to diverge
So in they went, 4 fingers crossed
Andy set the coordinates, destination: Lost
A pull of the switch, a turn of a knob
A great flashing light, the Elvis were gone
So now anytime you see a star, or read of Elvis’ fall from grace
You can thank Andy Warhol, for sending Elvis to space

by Mike Oncley

Part 1
Part 3
Part 4