While watching a fellow employee scoop raisins into a plastic container, i looked at the bag and noticed the image on the bag clearly depicted raisins as well as grapes. This is obvious because raisins come from grapes. Then I thought about grape juice, very delicious and good for you, but is there raisin juice? No thats stupid, why would you dry something out and then expect to make juice from it..... oh wait.
PRUNE JUICE! Prunes are dried out plums. So why would you name a liquidy drink after the dried up fruit that the drink actually comes from? This stuff should have been named Plum Juice from day one. Doesn't that sound more appetizing? I want some friggin plum juice right now. Look at the bottle, there are plums on the label! Not prunes, plums. Not even both prunes & plums, just straight up, juice filled plums. Also, what if I want to enjoy some delicious plum juice as one would enjoy some grape juice or apple juice? You cant do it. Once anyone sees you buying prune juice at Ralphs they think, "boy, that guy needs to shit." "Oh it seems to not be scanning. *loudspeaker* price check on prune juice. price check on prune juice, this guy must be pretty backed up and needs to clear his pipes." followed by me grabbing the mic and trying to convince the store that i just like the taste.
I have devised a plan to make a business out of selling Plum Juice. It'll have Welches running for their money because it will allow all the closet plum lovers to finally enjoy their drink in public. The same goes for you delicious fiber breakfast bars. We get it, you have fiber in you. You don't need to put "FIBER!" across the label. Why not just call it "AWESOME BAR (with fiber)"?
Because if I want to enjoy my awesome bar and plum juice in the morning, I don't need people to automatically assume I'll be taking a fat dump in 3 hours.
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